Much like the eye, you don’t need to put soap in it! Often times people believe the vagina to be ‘dirty’ or ‘smelly’ and necessitates cleaning with soap and water, however this is entirely counterproductive….
In honor of STD Awareness Month, we’ve decided this Method Monday to feature the only method of birth control available on the U.S. market that protects against both pregnancy and STDs (a.k.a. STIs). You know it, you love it, you probably think of it every time you hear the…
Leaving your tongue soft and jaw relaxed, try licking her from vaginal entrance up to her clit and following the outer edges of her vagina along both sides. Repeating this technique going up and down and vice versa can be a great opener.
Hey! i just found this blog and went through everything on here so far! thank you for making a blog like this! i think it is something that is really necessary for us girls! ( and even curious guys! ) its just amazing! (: anyway i have recently been looking at different forms of contraception and i was wondering what your opinion is on that rod thats inserted into your arm? i think its called depo provera? thanks! :)
Oh thank you so much, I aspire to me a sexual educator and I truly love running this blog.
Concerning your contraception question, it most definitely is not a rod that is inserted into your arm! It’s an injection of hormones that makes your body think that you are pregnant thus your body doesn’t drop an egg to be fertilized.
Human sexuality is an integral part of our whole lives, and does not begin just at puberty. Many children experience their sexuality as early as from infancy, when they learn that putting pressure or directly stimulating their genital regions feels good. Masturbation is a normal…
Hi, thanks for your answer! I'm 18. I can't tell if my body is still changing or not! I had a blood test once where the doctor said that my hormones were normal and my irregular cycle was due to poor diet, and since I started my period at 14 I wouldn't grow any taller after 15/16 because my bones were fused or something, but my breasts have gotten gradually bigger despite no weight fluctuation. I don't know whether it will sort itself out or whether it will be a problem when it comes to sex :/
Hmm well I am sure you will find out when you are ready. Make sure to use protection and for you and your partner to be tested. It’s normal to feel mild discomfort your first time but if it’s very painful and you think the cause are your libia minoras then make sure to see your gyno.
A good way to start Cunnilingus is with the rest of the body. Don’t just go right to oral sex, take a while to get there and truly enjoy it. Seriously, the best way to make your partner feel pleasure receiving oral sex is if you feel pleasure giving it. This is true for a lot of sex acts. It’s a…
EVERYONE SHOULD READ THIS.
It’s a wonderful way to learn how to give cunnilingus or what your partner can do for you to have more enjoyment out of oral sex.
Embarrassing for me to ask this, sorry :( I have bigger... inner lips, and not only do they bother me because... well... I feel unclean when I'm on my period, but also, wearing tight jeans, riding my bike, stuff like that, it feels painful. It isn't massive, just... what can I do? I really just want someone to surgery it away :/
First of all, don’t embarrassed sweetheart! Feel free to click that anon button and ask until your hearts content.
This concern is very common with someone who is young. If you really think about it, it is pretty ridiculous how society scrutinizes a woman’s (although also experienced throughout the gender spectrum) appearance to an extent that even our genitalia has a “beauty standard”. If you go online you will find hundreds of thousands of girls who are very self conscious because of the size of the labia minora, when they really shouldn’t be because everyone is unique. The porn industry will sometimes photoshop protruding libia minoras, thus they aren’t seen in adult magazines or photo shoots very often. I understand aesthetics isn’t your main problem, though, and you are feeling discomfort throughout your daily activities. If you are teen I urge you to remind yourself that you are still growing. Many individuals who identify themselves with being a female will in average experience puberty until early twenties. This means that your genitalia could experience changes. I tend to try to not to get personal on here but when I was about 14-15 I noticed that my left libia minora was larger than the right one and protruded through the majoras. I freaked, and ran to my mother. She of course told me that it was normal and not to worry about it. In the same time frame my right one grew as well and I experienced discomfort in the activities that you mentioned and also in sexual intercorse with my then partner. I also looked into surgeries and did a bunch of researching online to find out what was “wrong” with me. I am 18 now and I can honestly tell you that everything turned out well, my minoras retracted which has allowed me to be discomfort free since then. Your situation could very well be like mine but if you genuinely feel pain and much discomfort, don’t hesitate in seeing your OB/GYN.
In this post I will try to explain to you a little bit about the vulva so I encourage you to grab a hand held mirror and follow along!
The mons veneris, Latin for ”hill of Venus” (Venus is the Roman Goddess of love) is the pad of fatty tissue that covers the pubic bone below the abdomen above the labia. The mons is sexually sensitive to some and protects the pubic bone from the impact of sexual activity.
The labia major are the outer lips of the vulva, pad of fatty tissue that wrap around the vulva from the mons to the perineum, or basically the end of the vulva. These labia are usually covered with pubic hair, and contain numerous sweat and oil glands. It is often suggested that the scent from these glands is sexually arousing.
The labia minora are the inner lips of the vulva, thin stretches of tissue within the labia majora that fold and protect the vagina, urethra and clitoris. The appearance of labia minora can vary widely, from tiny lips that hide between the labia majora to large lips that protrude. Like I have mentioned before, the appearance of your vulva is unique and can be considered a persons “second face”. Both labia are quite sensitive to touch and pressure.
The clitoris, is a small body of spongy tissue that is highly sexually sensitive. Only the tip of the clitoris shows externally, but the organ itself is elongated and branches into two forks, the crura, which extend downward along the rim of the vaginal opening toward the end of the vulva. The clitoris is much larger than most people think it is — about 4” long, on average. The clitoral glans or external time if the clitoris is protected by a clitoral hood (thank you to @fwip-buttologist-md for noticing the typo!), a covering of tissue similar to the foreskin of a penis, During sexual excitement, the clitoris may extend and the hood will retract to make the clitoral lans more accessible. On some people the clitoral glans is very small; others may have a large clitori that the hood does not completely cover.
The opening to the urethra is just below the clitoris. It is not related to sex or reproduction, but is instead a the passage for urine.
I think I have what many call an "outtie vagina" and I'm so ashamed of it because you hear most people say how disgusting it is. I'm actually afraid of anyone seeing me naked. Also I have the whole big boob big nipples deal and I feel like they're not as perky as I'd like them and I don't know I'm just really embarrassed of my body. Are guys majorly turned off by this, honestly?
I was actually discussing this with a friend yesterday!
Outtie vagina, roast beef. Both those statements are not only rude but ignorant. Everyone looks different, no two vaginas look the same. My mother likes to call vulvas “a persons second face”. Same goes with breasts, we are all unique. Be proud of who you are and don’t let anyone let you think you’re unusual or not good enough.
I personally cannot tell you what some cis-men find attractive but it’s a bit cretinous to generalize a population like that. Not all men think the same way or find similar things attractive.
Love your body and yourself. Don’t you dare be ashamed of who you are and how you were made, don’t let anyone tell you how you should look like grrrl. I am certain that there is an abundance of humans in the world that will find your body and your mind stunningly beautiful.
This doesn’t really pertain to women’s health but hokayyy
What causes premature ejaculation? There’s not one cause; it’s a combination of factors. Some believe anxiety is the culprit, repetitive learned behaviors, excessive or insufficient arousal, or muscular tension. They’re all associated, and addressing each of them is the key to curing premature ejaculation.
Because premature ejaculation is associated with infrequent sex, men with low frequencies of sexual activity often get extra excited and aroused, which can manifest as performance anxiety when sex presents itself. Even men with frequent sex can get extra aroused. Reducing anxiety is different for everyone. Meditation, hypnosis or imagery exercises may help for some.
The start-stop method is a tested method to learning ejaculatory control and lasting longer. A male will stimulate his penis until he is ready to have an orgasm and then cease stimulation. Why this self-administered torture? You’re training yourself to find when your ejaculatory inevitability occurs, or your point of no return. This is the moment before orgasm when you’re about to explode. Instead of ejaculating, you refrain from stimulation and allow the feeling of orgasm to subside.
I have a tough one for you: I'm a 19 year old female and i've never had a normal period, in fact I can only remember ever having 3 or 4 random ones (the last one being over a year ago). I talked to my gyno about it (like 3 years ago), he issued some tests, and the results confirmed that I had no problems with my hormones. Also my breasts are shamefully small, as in still in second developmental phase; they've been that way since my first period, at the age of of 15. So, my question for you is:
Should I be concerned about this? I feel like it's a big deal. I mean, if I don't menstrate, does that mean I can't get pregnant? I feel like puberty forbot about me lol
Oh baby girl! I will try my best alleviate these concerns.
Foremost, you mentioned that you saw your OB/GYN and he ran hormonal test on you, which came back normal. But this was three years ago and a lot could have changed, so I would suggest making an appointment as soon as you can. You should be regularly attending the OB/GYN at least once a year at your age, so keep that in mind. Also, your breast should never be “shamefully” small. Grrrl, be proud of what yo’ mama gave ya’!
Regarding if you should be concerned, your period depends a lot on your diet (many people who suffer from anorexia or bulimia nervosa lack the amount of fat in their diet that that is required for menstruation). The amount of physical activity you partake in also has an impact on your period. Stress and your emotional state may also play a part in this dilema. But to tell you the honest truth, I don’t quite know what is wrong and I think that you should seek medical attention regarding this.
Furthermore, yes! the possibility of you getting pregnant is still intact. Menstruation happens when the lining of mucous and blood that was being prepared for the fertilization of an egg is released, due to that the egg was not fertilized. For some reason, something is impeding that lining to be created. But an egg could very well still be dropping every month waiting to be fertilized.
Sorry if I wasn’t much help and go make that appointment!
im SO insecure about it. i pluck the hair and shave it sometimes. i know you says its perff normal but other people dont think so, (ex my friends) i wish it would just go away :( its such a big deal to me..
There is nothing wrong with you removing any hair if it’s your personal preference, but please don’t let other people dictate how you should look. It is YOUR body and you should be able to do whatever YOU want with it.
If anyone has a problem with that, tell ‘em to fuck off.
does sex count as a cardio workout? and also does masturbating count as well, because it does get the heart racing.
A cardio workout is anything that raises your heart rate for an extended period of time, usually 20-30 minutes. It works all of the major muscle groups, and you should find yourself sweating and breathing hard during the most intense part of the workout. Cardio works large muscle groups repetitively (such as how running uses your large leg & arm muscles and swimming uses your whole body). Sex or masturbation do not typically use major muscle groups (or at least in a full range of motion like running and swimming)
How many calories you’re burning during sex really depends on too many factors. It’s like asking “does walking burn a lot of calories?” It depends on your speed, distance, duration, intensity, etc. But typically, thirty minutes of sex burns 85 calories or more. It may not sound like much, but it adds up: 42 half-hour sessions will burn 3,570 calories, more than enough to lose a pound. Although I would imagine you would get pretty tired if you wanted to actually lose weight by having sex.
about a month ago i got antibiotics for a uti and it got better. but i think its back again and i really dont want to go back to the doctor. help?
ugh UTI’s are so painful and annoying!
A urinary tract infection (UTI) is a bacterial infection that affects any part of the urinary tract. Although urine contains a variety of fluids, salts, and waste products, it usually does not have bacteria in it. When bacteria get into the bladder or kidney and multiply in the urine, they cause a UTI.
As an at-home treatment, increased water-intake, frequent voiding, the avoidance of sugars and sugary foods, drinking unsweetened cranberry juice, as well as taking vitamin C with the last meal of the day can shorten the time duration of the infection. Sugars and alcohol can feed the bacteria causing the infection, and worsen pain and other symptoms. Vitamin C at night raises the acidity of the urine, which slows the growth of bacteria in the urinary tract.
Additionally, you can drink the Apple Cider Vinegar ”cocktail” which is 2 teaspoons of ACV in 8 ounces of pure water - you can add a little bit of raw honey or maple syrup but that’s optional (if you’re diabetic, use stevia). Drink this first thing in the morning on an empty stomach, one hour before lunch and one hour before dinner.
Add one cup of ACV to a daily warm sitz bath (a large basin or a few inches in a bath tub).
Also, did you finish out your antibiotics? Many people stop the intake of their medicine when the symptoms subside, but you should always finish them out even with no symptoms because sometimes the infection may come back.
I know I have been ~all about~ hair lately, but those are the questions I have received so I must address da’ hair!
Most women have some hairs that grow around their nipple, on the areola (refer to wonderfully drawn picture by yours truly). This is perfectly normal due to that there are hair follicles in the areola. There is no reason to remove the hair for anything other than aesthetics, although removal in fairly simple. It is recommended to trim the hairs carefully with scissors but one can also pluck. If you do pluck, be aware that it may cause them to become ingrown under the skin which can sometimes cause scaring.
Shaving is something you DON’T want to do. This may lead to nipple irritation and not to mention, that it just simply doesn’t feel very good to the touch.
Moral of the story, YOU ARE NORMAL, THERE IS NOTHING “WRONG” OR “DIFFERENT” ABOUT YOU. You are beautiful grrrl(or anyone else in the gender spectrum) don’t let a few hairs on your nipples ever tell you otherwise!
I want to thank you for creating this blog. I haven't personally submitted a question but I want to thank you for being so open and helping everyone. I love reading your answers. You are fabulously smart and caring. I think people need people like you. Many are afraid to ask questions because of what others think and I want to thank you for tackling this problem. You are amazing and keep up the great work.
Thank you thank you thank you. This means so much to me. I want nothing more than to help people learn more about themselves, that is my ultimate goal. I encounter so many people how are young and are completely clueless about their anatomy or actually think there is something wrong with them, when what is happening is absolutely normal. I just want everyone to feel comfortable with themselves! But again, thank you so much and I encourage you to ask questions! :)
(copy and pasted from an ask on my personal from a while ago)
The reason why this is so long is due to that I often don’t have the time to fully explain to someone why I made this decision and this way I have the ability to entirely explain why I don’t shave. I don’t shave because I don’t want to. And this really is my primary reason, I just can’t be bothered. And fundamentally, I think that when it comes to beauty rituals like this, we have to realize that not wanting to is a perfectly valid reason not to do something. I would rather not waste valuable water with shaving my legs and pits when there are people without clean water to drink. Also, there is something very releasing and refreshing in realizing that you are not required to shave your legs to be a ‘real woman’ or an ‘attractive women’.
Of course, I do have reasons going beyond my perfectly valid laziness, though that is the primary reason. I started shaving my legs when I was 13, around the time that a boy in my class saw the hair on my legs and told me that it was disgusting, and if I’m going to show my legs, I really should make sure to shave them. He wasn’t deliberately being nasty, but the newly teenage me was totally horrified. I couldn’t bear the fact that something about the way I looked disgusted people (and more particularly, disgusted men), so I started shaving. And this is important to remember, I, like most of us, only started shaving in order to make the way I looked more acceptable to those around me. Shaving has no benefit to me, it doesn’t make me happy, I don’t enjoy it, it was just to make me normal. And now I’m making the adult, educated choice, not to be normal. Its over-rated.
We cannot live our lives just assuming that we do things because everyone else does, and we are required to, we need to start analyzing them. Why is it that women shave legs/pits and men don’t have to (some do, but its not a requirement to be attractive). “The Beauty Myth” talks about how ideas of female beauty are used to control women, and limit them, and I think that has some bearing here. Other people have brought up how the desire for hairless women, makes us look pre-pubescent, child-like. Why would I want to stop being a woman and become a girl again?
So, I guess I don’t care how much of a social stereotype I am (queer, hairy feminist), I am embracing my right to look exactly how I choose to, and not to be limited by constraining ideas of what society says is attractive.
I shave and pluck my pubic hair (I'm female) and I've recently noticed that as it grows back, it has become extremely fine and thin, (which I understand is an effect from plucking) but it's also growing back blonde. Some of the hairs are completely blonde, and then some of them only have blonde tips and then the rest of the hair is its usual dark brown black. So you have any idea what's happening?
First of all, wow you must have a really high pain tolerance because I cannot fathom the thought of plucking each hair individually !
Like you said, what is happening is an effect from plucking. Both plucking and waxing reduce hair growth when preformed at regular 30-day intervals. Due to that plucking pulls the hair out of by the root, it grows back softer, finer, thinner and sometimes in a lighter shade. It may also be the fact that hair that is closer to the vulva is most commonly a lighter shade then hair that is in the 2-3 inch area above the vulva, which is darker.
Happy Method Monday! Today we bring you the oft-misunderstoodfemale condom—which you may or may not realize has been revamped in recent years to be more affordable and less, erm, squeaky. Yep, it squeaked before, now not so much. The revamped version is called the FC2,…
I'm kind of hairy for my age, and always get comments on how hairy my body is. (Legs, arms, face) I find it kind of embarassing especially due to being the only one my age with so much hair. I also have hairy thighs, and a hairy buttox. I'm embarassed about this and not sure what to think of it, and not sure what a girl would think of it! Help please!
This is a concern that not only males have, but everyone else in the gender spectrum as well.
So let’s talk about your hair really quick:
Facial and chest hair are sometimes refereed to as “androgenic hair”, because their growth is regulated by testosterone and other hormones called androgens. These hormones occur in higher amounts in cis-males than cis-women, although this can vary from person to person. But this is why cis-men tend to develop more facial, arm, leg and chest hair than others. And in spite of a biological disposition for growing body hair, the amount of hair someone grows is mostly dependent on genetics. Long story short, you can’t do jack shit about what grows on your body because it’s how the good Lord made ya’.
I encourage you to learn to accept and even embrace the man you are, hair and all. Being hairy isn’t something to be ashamed of - if it’s the way you’ve been made, it’s part of what makes you, you. Anyone that actually cares about you and your feelings will love you regardless of how many hair follicles are on your body.
Plus, I personally love hair and I think it’s awesome to play with!
If you are in a monogamous relationship and you both have been tested recently, they really are not. Although, it can also be used to aid cunnilingus when one of you guys are on their period.
However, if you are going to have sex with a girl that you just met two hours ago at the club, I would highly recommended it. You can catch many things from oral sex with a female. Including, Genital herpes, oral herpes, HPV, syphilis, etc. Anything that is passed from direct physical contact or through certain body fluid (i.e., vaginal secretions)
I got several questions concerning this, and I was already thinking of addressing it so lets get to it!
In layman’s terms, an orgasm is an intensely pleasurable physical response that results from the release of tension built up during sexual stimulation. During arousal, your heart beats faster, your breathing quickens, your nipples may become erect and your genitals become engorged with blood. As the arousal climbs, these sensations increase until you climax, i.e., you orgasm, and your body returns to its unaroused state.
While the physical process is the same for everyone, the actual orgasmic experience varies from person to person. In fact, every orgasm is unique, even your own. You might feel a mild tingle one time and an explosive full-body rush the nest. However, there are some general tip-offs, such as contactions in your vagina, pelvic lifting or thrusting, curling of the toes or fingers, heavy, rapid breathing and moaning, followed by a sense of euphoria.
Chances are that if you are not very sure whether you have orgasmed or not, you most likely haven’t, due to that the feeling being so distinct that it’s unlikely you’d confuse it with anything else. If you suspect that you aren’t climaxing, you can learn by becoming familiar with your own body and how it reacts to sexual stimulation. Watch porn, think of a celebrity you find attractive or maybe even someone you have feelings for and masturbate! Stick your hand down your pants and just do it! The only way you can figure out how your orgasms feel is by having one yourself.
What's some things to spice up my relationship? You may not be able to answer this, but we're lesbians and don't use toys.
Of course I can answer this! Y’all taking to a queer girl ova’ here.
Regardless of the sexual orientation of the couple, sometimes your love life can become monotonous and boring if you keep doing the same thing over and over. The good news is that there are a lot of things that you can do to make your sex life not-so-boring.
Tribadism for example can be very pleasurable. I guess the street term would be “dry humping” (though it’s not necessarily very dry!) Fundamentally, tribadism is grinding your vulva against some part of your partners body. You can do it with clothes on or off and if you have an extremely sensitive clit, you may especially appreciate the indirect stimulation.
Watching or reading about how other lesbians do it can spark new ideas for you and your lover, not to mention get you in the mood.
I would want you to reconsider the fact that you and your partner don’t use toys because it brings a wonderful experience to the bedroom. It does not have to be something big and scary. I would suggest for you and your girl to go to the sex store together, make it fun. Play around with what you see and consider what could be interesting to incorporate at home.
Additionally, another thing you can be interested in looking into, is purchasing some books. I recommend Lesbian Sex 101 & The Whole Lesbian Sex Book
My girl and i have wanted to try anal... any thoughts on how to go about that
Foremost, a precursor to any successful sexual experience you may want to have with your partner is consent. Don’t just shove yo’ stuff into your partner because you have simply talked about it before. Sit down and discuss how you both feel about it.
When you do decide to try it out, go very slowly. Most couples agree that anal sex only works when both people are very turned on, so spend time building up to it doing whatever gets you going — oral sex, vaginal sex, watching porn. And remember, anything you stick up your butt should be generously coated with heavy water-based lube.
Unlike the vagina, the anus is not self lubricating. With insufficiently lube, you’re susceptible to tiny internal tears, which can cause pain and infection, and encourage the STD’s. But that doesn’t mean anal sex is inherently more dangerous. As long as you use a condom and there is enough lube, you’ll be reasonably safe.
No single position is ideal, but the receiver should be in control. Missionary works and spooning is great as well. Doggie-style provides great G-spot stimulation, with the receiver on all all fours.To make sure you dont thrust too deep, you should enter, stop, and wait for the receiver to get used to the feeling.
I hope you and your partner enjoy and I encourage you to consider it the other way around! A lot of men don’t realize how good it can feel for them, because the prostate gland can be directly stimulated. That may be an idea not everyone is totally comfortable with it but it doesn’t hurt to think about it. Regardless, have fun!